Slacker at your service

Soooo let's see.  Um wow long time no write.  

Went to the G'burg.  While we were there my husband said a whole bunch of, "I don't want to do this, this, this, etc." When he finally said he wanted to do something.  I said, "No, I don't want to do that." :)

I of course have been working.  Ummmm

The one year anniversary of my grandmother being killed in that wreck was Friday.  I was ok until I started reading Facebook statuses in my office that morning.  I just started bawling and had to make myself stop.  Whenever I think about her death, then I start thinking about my granny passing away.  Even though that has been 11 years ago it is still fresh in my mind too.  On this subject, I feel obligated to tell you something that I believe.  I believe that when a person passes that they go and check on all of their family members and try to comfort them in someway.  I will begin by telling you what happened last year after my Nanny was killed.  I will be 100% honest.  I was not really close to my Nanny.  If you knew my family (or maybe you do), you would understand.  I have a ton of cousins, second cousins.  This side of the family is LOUD.  Ok, um that may even be an understatement, but I think everyone is always closer to one set of grandparents.  That being said I really don't have a ton of memories of just me and my Nanny, so there is not a lot that I would see as a sign persay of her being close by BUT on the day of her funeral.  The day I was feeling so entirely guilty because I could not afford to fly home, so that I could be at the funeral.  I was in the stockroom of the Tustin store, and at the time the funeral was starting, two different songs played.  The first song NEVER plays on Rite Aid radio.  Heat Wave.  You may be asking yourself what on earth this would have to do with my nanny, so here you go.  When my brother Matthew was little, we were over at my nanny and papa's house.  My nanny had this little Valentine's Day stuffed animal that sang Heat Wave.  Matthew loved that thing.  He played it over and over and over, and he would dance.  When that song played on the radio, I knew she was with me letting me know it was ok I wasn't there.  The second song that played was I will always love you.

 I have never told anyone this before in fear of being thought of as crazy, but after my granny passed away I remember lying in bed and crying my eyes out.  I was really close to her, and her death was (and honestly still is) one of the hardest things I have ever gone through.  While I was lying in bed crying, I felt something that totally caught me off guard.  I felt a hand on my back for a split second.  I KNOW it was her.  I know because I felt her around me all of the time during the days after her passing.  I had a necklace that I wore during this time that I would reach for and almost every single time I would reach for it, it would just fall off like someone had undone the clasp for me.  My dad had been looking for a metal matchbox that he had as a kid that he KNEW he had at the house.  He told me that one day he was in his parents' bedroom, and something told him to use the key to the box that he had at home on the box that was in my grandparents' bedroom.  When he opened the door, there was the box he had been looking for.